Literary London is a six- week program for English students to go study in America’s estranged homeland. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.

Mainly at this stage its all questions. I tend to love this phase. The part of the story when no one quite knows what will happen.  Everything I know is followed by a question.

I know we are staying in apartments. Will I get along with the other girls who will be in mine? What if they only want to go to bars and clubs and never do anything else?

I know that I have to get on a plane for the first time ever. How should I best go about not having a panic attack? Medication to make me sleep the whole time or maybe a good book that I have already read so I can fall into a nice comfortable story? Anyway, I just need to keep from gripping the seat and screaming.

I know we will have a lot of free time to explore. Will I be fine to explore solo? I should maybe look into the crime rate…and invest in pepper spray. I tend to like to wander around. It’s my favorite thing to do in a new place.

I know I don’t want any travel guides. Is this really a good idea? Really, none? Maybe. I don’t want to be too caught up in trying to see what everyone else thinks I should see.

The truth of the matter is right now is a perfect time to study abroad. With the economy’s downturn in the past few years the number of students applying for study abroad programs is down. Also, due to the economy it is easier to get financial aide for school of any kind, and yes that includes studying abroad. I have wanted to do this for a really long time and am finally getting the chance…in a way, because of the terrible economy. So give it a try, talk to your financial aide advisor and pick a program.

We all know that times are rough. Every dollar counts. This is why we are tinkering with a concept known as “microscholarships.” We can’t say that we created the term, but we hope that other companies will follow in our path and make more microscholarships available to students.

We’ve created a contest that is giving out $100 microscholarships to ten (10) entrants.

Plus, we’re making it VERY EASY to enter. It’ll probably only take you 30 seconds to submit an entry to win a $100 microscholarship.


In a nutshell, here’s HOW IT WORKS:


1. Follow us on Twitter (http://twitter.com/realcollegetour).

2. Send us a Tweet telling us why you deserve one of our microscholarships or why you want one of them. It’ll look something like this:


3. The contest ends at 11:59 p.m. EDT on January 31, 2010. This means your Tweet must be in by then.

4. You can Tweet as many submissions as you want.

5. Entries will be judged on the “originality” and the “entertainment value” of the Tweet. Make them wise, clever, and/or fun!

6. All  ten (10) Winners will be announced on February 14th, 2010. We’ll contact the winners via Twitter, so don’t be a stranger!

Don’t forget to tell all your friends and family about the scholarship!

For more info, go to the Twitter MicroScholarship Page.

I am a hermit. Not the old fashioned kind where they live in a cave in the forest and eat bugs but in the sense that on the rare occasion I can stay holed up alone in my apartment to watch TV all day I take it. (The day is especially good if an SVU marathon is on.) On the average hermit day I’ll wear big socks, fleece sweatpants and a hoodie (that 99% of the time don’t match at all) and maybe even a hat, camp out on the couch with a blanket and my computer and watch TV all day with my cat.  If I’m feeling especially cold though I’ll break out my newly gifted Snuggie courtesy of my grandma (because they always have the warmest clothes). Not the most exciting thing to do, but the sweet sweet act of doing absolutely nothing is wonderful after a semester of school. Even the simple act of cooking food seems strenuous and as we get further into winter and the temperature drops the idea of putting on real clothes and braving the snow (even if there is only an inch outside) seems like the worst possible idea. That’s what home delivery was invented for right?

Staying in all day though breeds an inescapable sense of laziness. A laziness so intense and so epic if may result in an over drafting fee from not doing needed chores like going to the bank which most responsible people would do. I however remain on the internet and surfing basic cable channels while contemplating big decisions like should I nap now or later?

Despite the alarming thought that this may be a series of practice runs for a lifetime of being a cat lady I relish these days when for one there is absolutely no reason why I should leave my house and sit steadfast on the couch because seemingly “important” chores like transferring money and doing laundry can certainly wait another day. And if I don’t keep up with the Kardashians who will?

College relationships are…odd. I would normally suggest that anyone in college remain largely unattached.
Issues with this statement:
A. I have been in a relationship my whole college experience.

B. Miami University has the record for relationships between students that become marriages.
But there are several good things about having a steady relationship in college. The main one being that you aren’t sharing the same things as everyone else. A college campus is like a playroom in a preschool, germs are everywhere and sharing is STILL encouraged.

You can usually expect anyone in a committed relationship to start to exhibit specific signs

1. The “Toothbrush”
a. In the real world this can be anything to signify that they will be back on a regular basis.
b. My boyfriend left his collectors box set of Buffy the Vampire DVD’s

2. The nice dinners out
a. In the real world this will last until things get to be pretty comfortable.
b. In college no one has the money for this. Chipotle counts.

3. The introduction to friends
a. Usually at a gathering specifically for the occasion.
b. Usually at a party or you run into them playing video games in his apartment/dorm.

4. You’re a team
a. Using the word “we” instead of “I” Being together all the time.
b. Literally. He picks you for his beer pong matches. Plus he knows you can distract the opposing team with your feminine attributes. Hey that’s…

5. Trust
a. In the real world this is trusting them with secrets, dreams, and trusting them to be faithful
b. In college this is generally the same! No cheating, and if you have to, just have to, trust not to do it with the roommate/dorm mate/friend.
i. Also trusting them to take care of you if you do happen to loose at beer pong.

With the rate of college suicides on the rise some schools are starting specific programs in order to help their students deal with stress. But in this time of our lives where we are supposed to be focused on enjoying ourselves (with a little bit of studying tossed in) and creating a future for ourselves what can go so drastically wrong?

Right now a lot of people are blaming it all on the economy. Students need funding now more than ever and it isn’t always available. Also with the decrease in jobs a college student could look at their future and see a whole lot of nothing. It’s hard to go through the typical four years with fear that you may not be able to get a job once you graduate.

Most schools have their own suicide prevention hotlines and counselors to unload your doubts on. Is this enough? Depression is a terrible thing and a lot of students don’t want to go talk to a professor or parent or anyone about their feelings.

There are several things that a student can do by themselves to help combat depression and suicidal thoughts. The main thing is to try to stay positive. Last year I couldn’t get funding for school. My family was in a bad place financially and my life felt like it was out of control. To be honest there were a lot of days that I didn’t want to get out of bed at all, much less socialize. I found a few websites that made me feel better and they helped me put things into perspective (at least a little bit).

One, of course, is postsecret.blogspot.com. A lot of people have said that this website has helped them with depression. Post Secret is a website where people from all over send in their secrets to share online. It can definitely make a person feel less alone.

Another, sadly, is icanhascheezburger.com. I hate to admit it but LOLcats can always make me feel better. Cute cats, funny captions, what’s not to love? Seriously, just try it on a bad day. (p.s. don’t judge me!)

Then there is givesmehope.com, This site is amazing. It is exactly how it sounds. People post things that happened to them that gave them hope. It does a lot to remind its readers that not everything is crashing and burning.

If you are depressed, try to get help. Even if that help is telling a close friend so that they can help make your day brighter. College is only a few years out of your life, enjoy it, your whole future is waiting for you on the other end.

Stop it!

To fill the rest of you in on the story; Monday nights I am in an anthropology class on Indians in Wisconsin.  At first I thought that this class would be easy, my thought being, “How many Indians could really be in Wisconsin?”  I got my answer shortly after the first few weeks of class, ALL OF THEM!!!  All of my prior Indian knowledge came from Pocahontas and what I learned from the black jack tables while I was slowly funding some guys Escalade with rims larger than the table I was playing on.  When I hear the word Miami all I can think about is the Dolphins and how much I don’t want to go there during the summer months.  Not the tribe the originated in Ohio.  So knowing this you can pretty accurately assume how I’m doing in class.

So now to this asshole.  I thought that everyone was in the same boat as I was, confused and angry at life.  But this man decided to push us one step further.  This man is not a student, this man happens to be an expert on Indians in Wisconsin, one of two.  The other of course being our professor.  You sir, are a drain on our class.  If you really have the balls to argue with the professor what time periods a tribe spoke a now dead language you do not belong in this class.  Now in this mans case he wins these arguments.  Dude if you already know this stuff don’t take this class.  I understand if you need this class to graduate, in this case just don’t come to class.  There is no attendance and you already know this crap!  Thanks to you I never make an appearance in class, and even I am passing.

All I ask is that you think about my self-esteem before you flex your brain in class.

That is all.

Unless you’re a Rockefeller descendant, lottery winner attending an in-state university on a full ride scholarship, you’re a broke college student. Get over it; besides the aforementioned nonexistent example, college kids are expected to be poor.

As December creeps closer, rent and food money are no longer the biggest issues. It’s holiday season, which means you’re obligated to buy people things. That, or suffer the consequence of being labelled a heartless bitch. Your choice. Just keep in mind that picking the latter means you’re a heartless, selfish bitch. But whatever, still your choice…

Anyway, as always, I’m here to show you the ropes. Here is your personal guide to avoid wasting booze money on Christmas presents to cool, cheap, unique gifts!

For your friends: Mix CDs. Even though your friends can probably find and illegally download any song ever recorded on the internet, not much beats the high school flavored nostalgia of a good ol’ mix CD. (If you need help filling gaps in your playlist, plug in some songs you irrationally assume were written about you and your friends).

For your mother: A drawing. You’re not an artist? Not even remotely problematic. Hand her your archaic rendering of something sappy (two different animals displaying their unlikely friendship perhaps?) and say it took you weeks to finish. Tell her it reminds you of your powerful, impermeable relationship; moms eat that shit up.

For your father: One coupon to take you fishing/golfing/something outdoorsy whenever he wants. This gift is thoughtful and also suggests a desire for father-child bonding. Don’t worry about following up on your promise; utilize the same techniques you used to get out of these events for the past 20 years. That is a last resort; hopefully after a while he’ll just forget.

For the weird uncle: A miscellaneous object. Pick up a strange, foreign object from a dirty street. Give it to your uncle. Make a wild claim about how the drummer from White Snake used the object to wipe the sweat off his ride cymbal. Casually add how vicious the bidding on eBay was to get it.

For your little cousins: Last semester’s textbooks. Wrap up the now outdated textbooks your school’s STUPID bookstore refuses to buy back. When your cousins rip through the wrapping paper, tell that those books are the stuff college kids read and reading them will make you a super genius. They’ll love it for like two seconds until they open the next present. Whatever, your little cousins are annoying anyway, good enough.

For the remaining (siblings, significant others, co-workers, etc): Tell them their gifts are on the way. Excessively complain about how Amazon miscalculates it’s shipping estimates. After you’ve open your stash of holiday presents from your “loved ones”, re-gift all the crappy stuff. Will anyone ever find you out? No, never. Everyone wins.

Using my guide, you’ll save enough money for another semester’s worth of nightly 2 a.m. pizza runs textbooks. Happy gift-giving!

Just added Miami University – Oxford to the website. This guide is seriously awesome. The info in this college guide is juicier than yesterday’s turkey. Seriously.

Don’t believe me? Read some of the “RAW & UNCENSORED EXCERPTS!” Like, wow. RealCollegeTour.com is TRULY the home of uncensored college info…. If you don’t want to get assaulted by some scumbag frat boy, you should read this guide. We actually NAME which frat at Miami University is known to roofie girls…and guys.